Thursday, 31 May 2007

When Seagulls ATTACK...

After coming back from lunch, a friend from downstairs called me within minutes of my return and asked if I had cleaned my car recently?
An odd question I thought, so I walked my intrigued butt downstairs and he pointed out the total annihilation that just happened to my poor bonnet:

For some reason, seagulls hang around were I work and seem to 'offload' all together in one concentrated patch with remarkable accuracy and we have no idea why.
I've witnessed this phenomenon many a time, but I've never actually been the target, so I guess it was the short straw for me this time :`[

Something fishy is definitely going on!!!
(A trip to the carwash on the way home was also going on)

Today, I'm Most Angry About:
Crap DIY kits and equally rubbish accompanying manuals... GRRR
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 5/10

Today's Top Tip:
Smokers: Give up smoking by sticking one cigarette from each new pack up a chubby friend's arse, filter first, then replacing it randomly in the box. The possibility of putting that one in your mouth will put you off smoking any of them!

Thursday, 24 May 2007

KFC Vs Tan Hill...

Some of you may know this story, but for those who don't...

Cutting a long story short, Tan Hill Inn innocently call their Xmas dinner a 'Christmas Dinner Family Feast' as it best describes what it is and no harm in that eh?

Well, Kentucky Fried Chicken somehow stumbled across the phrase "Family Feast" on the Tan Hill website and decided to send them a letter 'ordering' them to remove it from their menu and site as they claim that phrase as their own and further action would be taken if they did not! The landlady thought it was another April Fools prank letter after previously receiving mine and phoned me to tell me all about it :]

Tan Hill didn't stand for this petty stab at them and stood their ground and after the landlady made much British publicity (BBC TV news, GMTV, national papers and even Chris Evens BB2 radio show) KFC eventually backed down!!! YAY for Tan Hill.

If you want to watch the short BBC news video, it's labelled 'Storm in a bucket at Tan Hill' on the right here.
the article can be read here.

Talking of Tan Hill, that's where I'm off to this Bank Holiday for a fun working weekend, so see ya'll next week and have a great end-of-week everyone!

If it's not a bank holiday where you are... UNLUCKY :0)

Today, I'm Most Angry About: Irreversible things! (and I'm not talking about cagoules)
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 7/10

Today's Top Tip:
Spectacle wearers: Save money on expensive handkerchiefs by using toilet roll to clean your glasses with before wiping your arse. NB: Must be done in this order!

Sunday, 20 May 2007

Weekend Synopsis...

This weekend was spent locally around home, which actually made a nice change, although it wasn't without its moments...

Friday Night:

After being woke up again at the usual 3:50am by my neighbour slamming his front door shut and his noisy car exhaust, I've reached the end of my tether putting up with this for nearly 6 months, so I paid my neighbour a visit and had 'polite words' with him!
He was very pleasant and said that he's a postman; so that's why he gets up early and he didn't realise he was disturbing me??? He said he tries to be quiet of a morning as not to disturb his still sleeping girlfriend!?! He also informed me his exhaust is 'broken', so it has no silencer and that's why it's so loud.
(Broke for nearly 6-months and nothing to do with it being the size of a Sherman tank's 75mm cannon??? Hmmm)

If he disturbs me all this week, as is now normal, I'm going round again on Friday to see if he's got an ETA on 'fixing' the car. If not, it's
"No More Mr Nice Guy" GRRR

Saturday Day:

I was round at my sisters and noticed this in the garden:

Any of you boffins care to fill me in on what this vivid insect is?

I also spotted this striking flower, so again, anyone wanna clue me in?

It was also my niece's 14th birthday

Me and a mate then went on an 8-mile walk around the local countryside

We came across a field full of... Ostrich... Emu..?

It was another fluffy cloud day

Although it did rain a couple of times and you could see the haze of distant rain heading our way.
It even got my crisp & Marmite* 'MANWICH' wet `:[

Came across a field full of lovely inquisitive Jersey heifers

And then walking through a farm, I spotted a barrel of 'Everyday' udder wash! LOL
"Take two bottles into the shower? Not these cows!"

Look what I spotted!!! An official 'Shropshite Star' van... Oh my... Maybe that farmer's threat was more serious than first thought?

Saturday Night:

Quite a novelty to be at home on Saturday night, so I spent it chilling; eating lamb curry; drinking beer; watching Lost

Sunday Day:

Odd-job catch up day...
Feeding my holidaying friend's rabbit
Visit to pet shop for dog presents (Guess where I'm going?)
Watched the second 'Ghost in the Shell' movie 'Innocence'

Thought it was a good idea to count out all my 1pence and 2pence coins as my 'bucket-o-change' was full after roughly 7 years of feeding it bronze wallet shrapnel

Bad idea... It took me nearly an hour to sort this little lot out!

There's most of the 2Ps sorted into stacks of 5... Now for the 1Ps *sigh*
Why I did this upstairs sat on my bathroom floor I don't know :)

A grand total of £28 (€41 $55usd $66cad $84sgd) WooHoo!

Sunday Night:

Consisted of:
Eating a Pea and Pancetta pizza
Watching another episode of Lost
Writing this
Listening to new chooons I've 'acquired'

[* pure class]

Today, I'm Most Angry About: Pi - to fifty decimal places for no good reason!
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510/10

Today's Top Tip:
Make your partner cry when you're having a romantic meal out by phoning and telling them :[]

Wednesday, 16 May 2007

A Wet & Windy Weekend in Wales MkII...

Day 1:
A few of us got together and went to a small Welsh town called Bala:

We planned to do many activities, but all of them were spoilt due to crap Welsh weather E.G. Rain and wind and lots of it!
The whole weekend was a bit of a disaster, but it was nothing beer didn't sort out :]

Bala lake looking very stormy indeed

The town itself is nice, if not a little rough at the edges, although you have to love the Henblas garage petrol station on the side of a house!

Technology seems to be new around here!
Whatever next?
TVs capable of displaying images?
Speakers capable of making a noise?
(Feel free to add your own...)

Day 2:

A generic DoGGa shot of the miles of country lanes we drove across to get to our first walk of the weekend...

The idea was to climb up here and walk along the Aaron ridge

It started to chuck down on the way up...

About half way up, it really started to pour and someone spotted this huge direction indicator through the rain at the bottom of the valley. Rather cool I thought and it distracted us from the wet stuff for all of 10 seconds...

I the wa back to the car, I spotted this lamb in the road trying to get back to it's mom through a fence, but it couldn't find a way through, so I cornered it, popped it back over the fence and watched the happy reunion, YAY!

Welsh+Toffee+Vodka are three words you would not normally associate being together, but this 'Toffoc' made in Wales is just gorgeous, so we all polished off a bottle on the evening.
(Take note of my rather nifty dog bone shaped keyring! :-)

I found this tiny comedy caterpillar on my leg.

We also played cards for a good while and my luck was NOWHERE to be seen that evening and I got fleeced all I had. My wallet ended up completely empty at the end of the night.
For example, take this jackpot that I was happily shovelling into thinking I was onto a winner... I was not best pleased :`[

Day 3:

On the last day we tried a smaller 2000ft mountain.
I was seriously knackered walking up this bit and if you could zoom in you'd see me flipping the bird to the camera... And I meant it at the time... So there! :0)

On the way up, I was dared 50p to go and tweak the bull's nose ring, but I decided not to even though the stakes seemed appealing

I did however fancy my chances with this tadpole.
Brave aren't I?

I even tackled this newt I found

We all made it to the top just as it started to piss down:
JohnnyG, Big Rich, Dave, Andy, Roy and DoGGa

Today, I'm Most Angry About: My e-mail system going down :(
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 4/10

Today's Top Tip:
Teenagers: Stop your trousers from falling halfway down your arse by wearing a strip of perforated leather with a buckle around your waist!

Wednesday, 9 May 2007

Fitness Camp... (ish)

As some of you may know, I reluctantly partake in circuit training classes three times a week in an attempt to fight the flab and lessen the guilt of not doing much in the way of exercise.

Most of the people who attend the various classes are a great bunch and this weekend saw the annual circuit training camping trip, were about 30 of us gathered in a field to have a bit of a laugh, light a big bonfire, do little exercise and drink responsibly*!

It's the 2nd time I've been and although a little tamer than last year, much fun was had.
It also gave me chance to try out my new Pentax Optio S7 digital cam:

View down to the farm and campsite by the Long Mynd

My fitness instructor Deane
(... and you should see him when he's pulling a funny face :0)

One couple turned up with a fab dogga called Ben, who I befriended straight away.
an incredibly intelligent and playful hound.

As well as Dean's camper van blowing up on the way there, we spotted this screw that Andy had acquired along the way too!!! Luckily it still got us there and back OK.

The loos on this site are something 'special'.
If you think the outside looks bad, you wanna try inside!

Ben shaking-a-paw with my niece Amy

My nephew Luke whittling sticks for marshmallow toasting later

The scenery round the campsite is lovely and typically British

In the afternoon we all played cricket... Well sort of cricket, but more like "Whack the ball as hard as you can and try not to get caught out!"

Ben was the best fielder and brought the ball back to the bowler if no one caught it

Good dog

To use the phone, a small trek up this steep track was needed to find signal, but the views from the top were good

A new filter to play with on my new camera :)

Sheep against sunset

Next was food, followed by beer, cocktails, beer, more beer...

...Which lead to this cool shot of Ben :0)

Angry Farmer:
There was a large mix up with whether we were or were not allowed to have a fire which led to the farmer coming over and giving us all a good rollocking and demanding we put it out. He even threatened to fine us £20 (Appox. 70p each) and that the 'Shropshire Star' would hear about this... The Shropshire what?

We sorted it all out and could light the somewhat now damp fire again, which was nothing a pint of petrol from Deane's van and a blowtorch held at arms length didn't sort out! WHOOOSH

The dog knew were to come and sit to get fussed and he became my personal hand warmer for the evening in return :]

[* Blatant Lie]

Today, I'm Most Angry About: Having an unusually large craving for a packet of 'Nice 'n Spicy' flavour Nik Naks and then not being able to obtain any despite going to two garages and two shops... Grrr :[
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 2/10

Today's Top Tip:
Dog Owners: If your dog accidentally fouls the footpath, remember this carries a big fine, quickly drop your trousers and tell passers-by you were 'caught short'